"Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws" - Barbara Kingsolver (American Novelist)

Today is not Mothers' Day. It is not Women's Day. It is not any specific day. But, I just want to share this with you all. I am fortunate to meet, talk and coach almost 40+ people every week, of ages 5 to 80. Since I'm specialized in Pregnancy Yoga, half of them are Moms-to-be. So far, I've been fortunate to guide more than hundred Moms-to-be. I meet them, talk to them, feel their concerns, their emotions and the incredible journey every one of those women go through to bring a precious new life into this world. From outside, everything may look SO fancy, so beautiful, so effortless, so taken-for-granted! But, I hear stories - which touch my soul. Here, I'm sharing a few...

One of them started attending my sessions the day she completed her 26th week. When I asked why she waited so long, she replied "I lost my first baby at 26th week. It was a relatively healthy pregnancy. I was anxiously waiting for today. My baby is still alive. His heart is beating..." The emotions on her face was of pride, happiness, bliss, gratitude, sadness and so much more.. 

One of them started attending in her 19th week. I asked if it's her first pregnancy, she replied "Yes, this is my first and probably the last. I have been doing fertility treatments for the past 2 years. I still don't believe this. I hope I'll make it till the end..."

One of them has this very rare condition of a blood vessel missing in her umbilical cord which supplies all the nutrients to the fetus. She is always bubbly and happy trying to keep it positive and trying to believe that her baby will make it. Her mind was supplying the love and positivity to the baby till the last moment and she delivered a healthy, vibrant, full term baby, thanks to Almighty!

One of them had a growing fibroid in her uterus. The fibroid also grew along with the baby, compressing the placenta and leaving less room for the baby. She had excruciating pain along her whole side of the body which triggered frequent migraine and pain in the spine which triggered sciatica. She suffered a lot, but kept smiling and feeling divinely grateful in all my sessions. Took all the positive energy from each session. Doc had asked her to be prepared for an emergency preterm delivery at 32 weeks. She surprised me with how well she took the emotional empowerment sessions, went till full term and delivered a healthy baby, thanks to God!

One of them has polio in one of her legs. She got it when she was just 6 months old. That leg is a bit shorter and weaker. Supporting her body weight, standing, walking everything is a challenge for her. It is unbelievable for me to see her journey of pregnancy. She surprises me with her high spirit, trying to practice most of the Yoga stretches with the help of props and support and being a sweetheart to everybody in the class. She would always come before time and take one of the front row spots, and practice by creating a zen aura surrounding her. She is now 36 weeks; and considering the fact that a woman gains 25 to 35 pounds during her pregnancy, I still don't know how she does this. Mother Nature! She is rocking it (thankfully) and preparing herself for a normal childbirth itself... 

Another one of them is 40 years old and is very anxious about if she can do this; in her language, "if I'll make it till the end". I took the freedom of a sister and counselled her over a long conversation even before she joined my sessions. She is suffering from very bad situation of varicose veins. Tried to conceive for the past 10 years without any result. Above all, she was really concerned about her age and how the pregnancy will progress. She is now regularly coming for the sessions and I see her facial expressions are far more pleasant and grateful these days than the first day I met her. In her language "I feel warm and happy after meeting other Moms-to-be and after practicing Yoga, my mind is at a better place. You are always in my prayers". 

Another one feels very concerned that she is gaining a lot of weight. She looks perfect to me. I asked for the specifics of the weight gain and it is in perfectly normal limits. When I asked her why she feels so nervous about it, she says "It's not me. My husband thinks I am getting fat".. 

The stories go on and on.. many are working stressful corporate jobs, travelling or driving long distances everyday, mothering other small kid(s) etc. Many of them find the yoga sessions an opportunity to unwind, to borrow a pair of non-judgmental, listening ears. Even when a pregnancy proceeds "normal" to the onlookers, the physical, mental and emotional roller coaster ride a woman goes through is not very "normal" and is a very demanding journey. It is not easy and many times a woman is the epitome of patience and sacrifice and unconditional, pure love which a mother alone knows! A Mother's mind is the reflection of Mother Nature itself and her body is an inextricable expression of the Universe itself, carrying and nurturing a beautiful New Life... Thankfully, being a mother of two and currently an expecting mother, I should know!! Some of the good old Indian cultures used to respect an expecting woman by getting up (if you are seated) and generally treating her with lot of respect, considering her very divine... 

To all the mothers and Moms-to-be that I know; not just humans, all the mothers in the Nature; I simply respect, admire and salute each one of you. For just being you, the most praised role in this universe, a Mother! Words are not enough to appreciate what you are doing.. I bow myself down in front of each one of you! To all the men who are reading this - I have only one thing to say - express your appreciation for her. Your mother, your sister, your wife, your adult daughter, your close female friend - tell her how much you value her. Yes, I mean it, express through words and actions.  If your wife or sister or daughter or close friend is expecting, ask her how she is feeling, try to understand her unspoken words and emotions, be a support, never ever bring her down during this phase, and just BE there for her. This is the most sensitive stage of a woman's life (I am not saying it, World Health Organization says it!). So, if you were looking for that perfect opportunity to express your love and value for her, this is it, grab it before it's over soon before the blink of an eye.

Again, BE there for her! Peace to all...

New Year Resolution: Do you have one? 

Don't worry if you don't have; because even those who HAD, would most probably have already broken them. How does a resolution work? Before the beginning of every Yoga session, I ask the students to close their eyes and think of a positive resolution just for that specific session. It can be very personal ('I wish to improve my sleep'), it can be very profound ('I wish to see more peace in the world') or anything in between. I ask them to hold onto that resolution till the end of the session. Why?
 
Having an intention or resolution before a session helps them to psychologically fix their awareness to achieving that goal. For some, the ripples of that resolution (depending on how firmly they make the resolution in their mind) last till the end of the class. For some, till the end of the day and for a lucky few, the ripples last longer. It all depends on how intensely they wish to achieve their goal. Resolution increases their focused awareness towards achieving that goal (no matter how hard it is) or at least to work their best to achieve them. If a person’s resolution is to reduce belly fat, he unknowingly elevates his awareness towards achieving that goal from every practice he does. If another person’s resolution was to see more world peace, he cannot obviously create that. But he changes the way he reacts to external situations, he tries to spread more peace around him, he tries to create ripples of peace and love which definitely creates its own butterfly effect.
 
The problem with “New Year Resolution” is that its ripples are supposed to last for one YEAR – which is almost impractical. And most of the resolutions made are over-ambitious and "life-changing". Hence most of us end up failing by the middle of January itself. Better alternative is to have bite-sized, achievable, practical resolutions at the beginning of every day. Every day is a NEW BEGINNING. Every day should be celebrated with lot of love and joy! For instance, if your New Year Resolution was to “Eat Healthy in 2018”, break it into pieces and on a New Day morning, you could have a resolution to cook a nice healthy dinner today. Another day, you could have a resolution to not visit the bakery section of the supermarket when you shop. Another day, you could have a resolution to include more veg of different colors in your cart today. These are all achievable resolutions. And once in a while, indulge in your favorite delights – don’t be so hard on yourself.
 
At the end of the day, New Year Resolutions are supposed to make us a “better” person – more relaxed, happier and healthier person. But many times, these resolutions end up increasing our stress levels and just do the opposite effect on us. Hence, say “cheers” to New Day Resolutions. Here’s to health, happiness and peace – every DAY! 

 You see new Moms, you see sweet l'il babies. What you don't see is the indescribably difficult phase that the mother has to go through post-delivery for a while. Personally taking every step to make that phase as effortless and pleasant as possible, I would like to share a few points here. This is for both men and women since we all co-exist. Writing this on day#6 postpartum seeing some of the questions from fellow moms... 

The first and foremost point for a faster recovery is to have a positive state of mind. I know it is easier said than done. How can you be positive when you have excruciating pain in all the most sensitive areas of your body, you are sleep deprived, your whole schedule is out of whack and your emotions are up on a roller coaster? It IS possible ! By filling yourself with a lot of gratitude, love, sense of new-filled pride of being a mother, sense of humility for being chosen for the divine art of Creation...

Second most important point is to NOT judge your body post-delivery. Your body just did the most amazing and incredible job of creating a human being from a single cell!! Give your body a break! Give your body some pure respect. It took 9-10 months for your body to do all the hard work required to provide the safe and nutritious haven to support and grow that life inside of you. Do not expect your body and mind to bounce back in a few days or weeks. It takes time. Respect that process of nature and trust me, with some focused effort from our side, we can definitely bounce back to a fitter body and relaxed state of mind. I do not like the term "pre-pregnancy body" just because it sounds hypocritical to me. The very same belly you used to adore watching grow with every week of pregnancy, suddenly should not be looked down upon or frowned upon right after the birth of your baby. Look at it with an elevated sense of respect because of the absolutely amazing job that it did. Just do NOT judge any area of your body or being post-delivery. With time, love and effort, you will definitely bounce back. This is also very important for the partner/family/friends. Even for the sake of cracking a joke, do not pass negative comments about a new Mom's body or state of mind. She needs all kinds of support more than ever in this phase.

Thirdly, understand that a woman's body, mind, spirit and emotions are anatomically, physiologically, emotionally, spiritually built to bounce back to a healthier, fitter, happier, more positive person after the process of childbirth. I repeat, have that pure FAITH in yourself. That faith will give you the energy to stay focused and aware of this phase. You will be able to draw energy from that faith to engage in focused activities including focused breathing, physical exercises and so many practices that Yoga provides to make this Postpartum recovery of your body, mind and spirit a smoother, mindful and positive journey. Hopefully, I will share with you later on the magic of Post-Natal Yoga.

PS: Practice of Pre-Natal Yoga throughout pregnancy helps a lot for a faster postpartum recovery phase in every aspect of it - simply because the difficulty of labor, delivery and postpartum recovery generally depends on how active you have been throughout your pregnancy (Please understand that there are always exceptions to these statements due to individual medical conditions/other scenarios). 

​“Why should I meditate? Isn’t it a waste of time? I can finish off one or two chores using that time…“ Does this thought feel familiar? Let me try to put it as briefly as I can… There is no more beautiful experience than knowing your own self. The only way to be selfless is to connect with your true self. Everything else will make you selfish in some way or the other. The real nature (Sattva) of your true self is always divine, is to be in service to the purpose of your birth. It may take a lifetime for some of us to feel that connection, or a few years or if you are really lucky enough, may be months of practice... How fascinating would it be to finally wake up one day and say “hello” to your true, beautiful, divine self?!

My 2 year old son is holding a torch light in one of his hands.  He managed to switch it on and is intrigued by the sharp focused light.  He is trying to touch the light with the other hand on all the surfaces and in the process he is running from room to room angry not able to "catch" the light.  Isn't this how many of us are trying to seek God ? Aham Brahmasmi... (Meaning: I am the Infinite Reality). Simple meaning: God is within each one of us. It is simply ignorant to seek God outside. We all have the power to be God if we utilize our full potential for the goodness of others. We all are here for a purpose. 
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